Kevin W. McCarthy

Do Manners Matter?

Ladies and Gentlemen, your manners distinguish you for better or for worse.  Above all manners are voluntary, a choice we make as to how you choose to be and to present yourself. 

Lately, I've been pondering both my language and carriage with a measure of concern. Our present culture is so accustomed to using and hearing profanity that we've lost our sense of what is profane.

Admittedly, I'm no Puritan as I'm apt to drop my share of curse words from time to time. When I'm real with myself, I don't like it when I do it. Cussing is typically lazy, dumbed-down language coming from the lesser me rather than the greater me. It tears me down and, worse, brings others with me, especially as a leader.

Yep, both my manner and manners matter. I'm working to be the best Kevin I can be. Will you join me in cleaning up your language? When you do, you're also becoming a better leader of your life by becoming a lady or a gentleman. 

In this classic (April, 20 2010) On-Purpose Minute, you'll catch me at the Ritz-Carlton on Grand Cayman Island. After the video I do a quick 270 degree sweep of this beautiful resort. Special thanks to Daniel, the concierge, who suggested where to shoot the video and escorted me there. Truly a gentleman!

Be On-Purpose!

Kevin

More On-Purpose Resources

• Are You Owning Your Mistakes? (kevinwmccarthy.com)
• How Do I Find Peace In My Life? (kevinwmccarthy.com)
• The Edge of Change Interview (kevinwmccarthy.com)
• What Is The Meaning of Life? (kevinwmccarthy.com)
• Are You Happily Distracted? (kevinwmccarthy.com)

Are You Prepared To Lose To Gain?

How do you deal with loss?  What is loss? 

Could it be that loss and, more importantly, learning how to deal with loss are simply as organic to life as the vegetable section at your local Whole Foods store?  In The On-Purpose Person, I reference fighters, floaters, fleers, and flitters as "styles" for dealing with stress and life. Learning to navigate loss is important to our health, well-being, and finances.

In today's On-Purpose^® Minute, let's explore the gains to be found in loss!  You might be surprised just how effective loss can be to our long-term benefit.

Click here to subscribe to The On-Purpose Minute which is published every Tuesday morning.

Related articles

• Are You In A Critical Condition? (kevinwmccarthy.com)
• Are You Still Living in Trial and Error Mode? (kevinwmccarthy.com)
• Is Money Mastering Your Life? (kevinwmccarthy.com)
• What Are You Worth? (kevinwmccarthy.com)
• What Is Your Cost of Pride? (kevinwmccarthy.com)

How Good Is Your Life Plan?

Be honest with yourself... do you even have a life plan?  My experience with clients and readers of The On-Purpose Person tells me very few people have any sort of a plan in place for their lives, especially a written plan.   Sure, we have ideas and dreams that we ponder now and then, but to take it to the step of writing out a plan is very rare.

 

Image via Wikipedia

 

Imagine a contractor attempting to build a house without blueprints.  It makes no sense, yet many of us are building lives without the benefit of a plan.  

Don't you want to have a life plan?  Chances are you don't know how to structure your life and process the information, so you haven't laid one out.

Take about two minutes to watch today's On-Purpose Minute.  You might be surprised to find that I know the world's best planner.  Drop me a line and I'll be happy to introduce you to him.

Be On-Purpose!

Kevin

 

Are You Starting A Diet on Monday?

Don't Diet!

"Diets don't work," flatly states my friend Dr. Wayne Andersen, the author of The Habits of Health and Living a Longer Healthier Life, and mentor in Judith's (my wife) health coaching practice.  Diets are short term decisions, not long term behaviorial and lifestyle changes so they don't work.

Don't Exercise Either!

Exercise is inefficient and often ineffective for healthy weight loss.  Exercise is important, but it needs to be in the right context of an overall program of health.

Do Invest 3 Minutes to watch A Weighty Conversation!

Below this video message is information to connect with a Health Coach of your choice or Judith.  Watch the message, then keep reading.

Do A Program, Not A Diet!

Your health rests upon making a better decision right now! 

• If your Health Professional or Health Coach sent you A Weighty Conversation, then get back in touch with him or her to help you.  They will guide you.
  
• If you need a Health Coach, please contact Judith McCarthy.  Email her right now and you'll soon be on your way to a healthier (and happier) 2011.

            Judith McCarthy, Certified Health Coach

            JudithMcCarthy@cfl.rr.com <copy and paste into your email message

My Story

This is the program that helped me lose my weight and keep it (mostly) off for over 2 years!  Is your lifestyle preventing you from really being more fully on-purpose?

Join me.  Over the holidays I packed on more than a few extra pounds and I'm starting back on the program Monday to lose 15 pounds!  Regardless of whether you need to lose 15 pounds or 150 pounds, join with me to live a healthier weigh... on-purpose!

Be Wise!

If you are on Type 2 diabetes, high blood pressure, or high cholesterol medication or obese, be sure to consult your doctor. Your health coach will work with you and your doctor to get you to a healthy weight and lifestyle.  Don't take unnecessary risks!

Quotes on Health

"As I see it, every day you do one of two things: build health or produce disease in your self."

Adella Davis (1904 - 1974)

"Look to your health: and if you have it, praise God, and value it next to conscience; for health is the second blesing that we mortals are capable of, a blessing money can't buy."

Izaak Walton (1593 - 1683)

Now there are more overweight people in America than average-weight people.  So overweight people are now average.  Which means you've met your New Year's resolution."

Jay Leno (1950 - )

Related articles

• Kevin, How Did You Lose Weight And Keep It Off For Two Years ? (kevinwmccarthy.com)
• How's Your Resolve For Your New Year's Resolutions? (kevinwmccarthy.com)

How's Your Self Talk?

 

Have you ever tried to break a habit?  At best, it is an awkward experience because we take ourselves off of "autopilot" and go into a "manual" mode.  Things we didn't think about... now we do.  And when it comes to breaking bad habits, the bad habit can preoccupy our thinking. 

Athletes know that a normal part of breaking a bad habit is a slump in performance.  It is expected.  Perfection is not the standard, but progress.

Habits are defined as acquired behaviors.  The implication here is that if we can acquire new habits, then we can also dispose of bad ones.  Now there's hope!

Imagining life with benefits of our new habits is the easy part.  Making it happen - not so easy!  Our underlying premise has to be that we're capable of far more than we understand or will push ourselves. 

I've been watching the Discovery Channel series, Surviving the Cut.  While each branch of the military is training its soldiers for different missions, one consistent theme comes across.  These soldiers will face life and death situations and they need to understand that they are far more capable than they know and understand.

Personal motivation - a compelling reason, a why, a purpose - combined with an unwavering willingness to pay the price defines the outcome.  That said, extraordinary moments of truth emerge in the midst of the ordinary that test our purpose against our progress.

Moments of truth are pronounced in our self talk.  I'm not talking affirmations, positive talk, or positive mental attitude here.  Let's get to the guts of the matter, the real inner conversation.  The ones haunted by doubt, fear, anger, discouragement, disappointment, and hopelessness. We need to be equipped which is why I hope the AAA Approach can work for you.

Cover via Amazon

It is like there's a debate team living inside you.  Who will win?  How's your self talk coming along?  Use the AAA Approach to intervene on behalf of your new, better habit.  You'll be on-purpose!

Recommended Reading:  Read Pat Pearson's book STOP Self Sabotage.  Pat and I recently did an interview together.  I really like the way this lady thinks.  She brings great depth to the topic.

 

On-Purpose Profile: Michelle Aguilar

Weight loss has a definite physical component, but there is so much more to being well.  Our heart and soul, however, are what's often eating at us and why we eat to fill the void.  This video from the I Am Second series with Michelle Aguilar, a winner of The Biggest Loser TV show, provides great insight into the cause and cure.  (Click on the image below of Michelle to watch the video.)

After watching Michelle's story, continue to view many more stories of some famous and not so famous people and why they are second.

Be On-Purpose!

Kevin

Are You A Fathead?

Dumb decisions come from dumb people or fatheads, right?  Wrong!  We're all subject to making stupid choices, but would you knowingly diminish your brain capacity?  Of course not!  Hm-m-m, then again...

What if a series of particular choices over time are making you especially susceptible to being a fathead?  What if those choices were within your control and could help prevent you from the compound effect of one bad decision after another?  Would you be interested in learning how to improve your decision making and to stop the waist?

At the risk of offending, this On-Purpose Minute challenges you look down on yourself for the answer to the question, "Am I a fathead?"   You'll know immediately if you suffer from this condition while watching this video - 70% of us do.

BTW - This is the confession of a recovering "fathead."

 

Do you need help getting your waistline to a healthy size?  I have an affiliation with health coaches across the USA who will gladly help you get your thinking clear.  Email me for a referral. They will help your life, health, and style of living be more on-purpose.

Watch this funny Geico advertisement featuring an all Too Honest Abe Lincoln and his greater than 32-inch waist wife. 

Some great quotes:

A waist is a terrible thing to mind.   - Tom Wilson

The one way to get thin is to re-establish a purpose in life.   -  Cyril Connolly, The Unquiet Grave

Never eat more than you can lift.    - Miss Piggy

The On-Purpose Leader Experience: Session 1 Replay

"What am I going to do when I grow up?" 

It is funny when we say it, yet the price of not really knowing who we are as grown-ups is needlessly expensive to every aspect of our lives.

I get it!  You're stretched to the max and burdened under more commitments than you have time.  Life is wrapped so tight, that you're not sure where to begin with making your life make sense.

Now, you can test drive The On-Purpose Leader Experience which is based on The On-Purpose Person.  Listen and watch the replay of the introductory webcast by CLICKING HERE.   You will be taken to the replay page.   Be sure to click on "SLIDES" in the upper left hand corner so you can watch and listen.

The program includes five remaining webcasts, replays, and web site support.  Enrollment for this series ends: Tuesday, June 1, midnight. 

Experience what it means to be on-purpose and to be in a community of on-purpose persons in creation.

Be On-Purpose!

Kevin

Who Will Awaken Your Worth? Janet Cronstedt Will!

Janet Cronstedt: An On-Purpose Person Profile

Janet Cronstedt is a dear friend and business associate.   When she turned 50 she came to an On-Purpose Person workshop and wrote her purpose statement of, "To the Glory of God, I exist to serve by Awakening Worth."   (Read her story here.) Since then, Janet has made more and better choices in her missions to be aligned with her purpose, moving toward her vision, and living true to her values.  She's the first to tell you it was a breakthrough moment in her life and being on-purpose is a high standard.

Thanks to Janet, I was booked as the keynote speaker for Take Shape Life Convention in July of 2008.   I had the breakthrough of becoming a client and losing 50 pounds and having kept most of it off since.  As a result of attending the convention with me, my wife, Judith, became a health coach with Take Shape For Life and is now helping many others get to a healthy weight and create the healthy habits to keep the weight off, often get off obesity medications, and be rewarded psychologically and financially.  Janet provided our family with a breakthrough.

Janet is an amazing speaker from the platform because she leads with her heart.  Invest 19 minutes and watch this two-part video from Janet's speech at the TSFL Convention from 2009.  You'll find it inspiring, hard hitting, and, most of all, one that awakens worth.  Thanks Janet for being you!

Be On-Purpose!

Kevin

Part 2

God & The Chocolate Ice Cream

I am a fan of Nic Askew, the creator of Soul Biographies.  "God & The Chocolate Ice Cream" starring Michael Neill offers provocative thoughts on the integration of the spiritual and material worlds - the space where I like to play and work.  Invest a few minutes and watch this short film that is embedded below. 

Ironically, before opening my computer and watching this video, I awoke about 5:30 a.m. and went to the freezer.  Last night I bought a quart of chocolate ice cream against my better judgment.  I at

Image via Wikipedia

e about half of the chocolate ice cream.  At 5:32 a.m. I pulled off the ice cream lid and turned the container upside down over the kitchen sink drain so it would thaw and disappear.  My decision was based on reasons of both health and spiritual discipline. 

From a health perspective I am 15 pounds over my goal weight.  I know I need to get back on the Health Program my wife coaches.  More importantly, the chocolate ice cream is a metaphorical impediment to my stewardship of all that God has given me.  Think of it as Jacob's hip or the thorn in Paul's flesh.  I've learned in talking with Judith and other health coaches, ultimately, it isn't what we're eating, it is what's eating at us.

My irrational desire for sugar, cream, and chocolate is more akin to an addiction.  It provides a profound empathy for the heroin or cocaine addict.  Truly, there, but by the grace of God go I.  It is a "no" to which I so often say "yes" (watch the video to understand).  Left unchecked, it would consume my life prematurely.  Intellectually I get it, yet lust takes over.  In this regard, I also relate to the sins of Tiger Woods.  Fortunately, my lust is more socially acceptable and less morally reprehensible.  Yet, make no mistake, it is lust gone awry.

I am reminded of Matthew 7:5: "You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye."  This scripture causes me to hold my tongue at the failings of others.  I'm making the attempt to avoid being a hypocrite!

So why dump the ice cream down the drain?  I've learned the best way to avoid sin is to not cozy too close to it.  Healthy boundaries make for a healthy life.  Sure, it is a fix, not a cure.  Until the deep work in my soul is reconciled, I settle for temporary acts of protection.  

Perhaps, now dear reader, you'll appreciate why I am a fan of Nic Askew.  He stirs the spirit of one who is in the business of stirring spirits.  My hope is my On-Purpose Minutes provoke you is similar fashion.

Be On-Purpose!

Kevin

'god & the chocolate ice cream' from Nic Askew on Vimeo.